I’m back here because I have put back most of the 30 lbs I lost in 2015. I have thrown out all my bigger clothes because I swore I would never go back to being that big again and now here I am – just 8 lbs short of where I started – and I am horrified.
It came back mostly within the past 6 months. Bad job, bad diet, bad choices, no exercise. My own fault. In January I got a desk job in an office of overweight workers who ate cookies and cake everyday and wondered aloud why they were so fat. The head of security loved to bake, you see, so he would bring in his labors for us to ‘enjoy.’ They were very good. Too good in fact, and I found myself going from ‘just a taste’ to full on large portions.
I quit the job after six months. It was a poor fit for me. So, I focused on staying at home with my son, working on my online business venture. But, the habits from that job stuck with me. Poor diet, no exercise, lots of staying indoors.
One day, my husband was taking a picture of me and when I saw it, I commented on what a horrible picture it was. I looked tired, pale, and old. When did I get old? I asked. Then, it hit me. It wasn’t because I was getting old – it was because I had gained the weight back, stopped exercising and therefore, LOOKED old. Hello, rude awakening! No wonder I didn’t sleep well anymore. No wonder my food felt like cement in my stomach. No wonder my knees and back ached.
So, here is my statement:
I won’t allow myself to become old before my time. I don’t want to live my life like one of my co-workers, stuffing my face with cake everyday and boo-hooing about being fat. I want to be one of those older women who people look at and say, “You’re over 50??” I want to be able to fit into clothes that don’t have elastic waistbands – except yoga pants. I don’t want to be battling diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol.
I remember Tony Horton saying in one of his videos that getting old is for people who don’t know any better. Welp, I know better.
I recently finished a book called Younger Next Year by Chris Crowley & Henry S. Lodge, M.D. and I highly recommend it. It really hit home for me as a late-middle aged person entering the golden years.
I want them to be golden, too. Like the sunshine. Not like the lighting in a hospital.
Have a wonderful day!